Times tell us that employees do not leave companies but leave their bosses instead. So what does it take to be that amazing boss, that is desired by all and with whom a subordinate would like to stay connected with; not just during the professional association but even after moving to different organizations.
One of my great friends and a very skilled manager at a multi national called me in one day to have a chat. It had become toxic for her to survive in the presence of this new leadership team member who she was partly reporting into. Resolving her concern is a separate chapter but what hit me in that conversation was her statement when she said, “I always say to myself that I will not be like them but a nice boss instead!” And I had to just stop her there. Right there.
What do you mean by being a nice boss? How is a boss nice?
Do they wear tutu’s and throw doughnuts at their subordinates?
She laughed in disagreement and explained how a nice boss would be always polite in their tone and create ease for their subordinates. While there is nothing bad about a boss who is nice like that but I really wanted to be specific here, so I asked, “Do you think you’re good at what you have learned all these years?“
”Oh yes!” She exclaimed.
“So, we’re your bosses nice?” I further investigated. And there she paused, for a little longer enough that formed an awkward silence between our conversation. And I continued reiterating, “No, they we’re not. Weren’t they? I mean you liked them. Still do. They even broke bread with you but they were not ‘the nice boss’ that you aspire to become, yeah?”… “Yes, true.” She agreed.
“A boss is not supposed to be nice,” I further elaborated… “specifically put, they must be approachable, yes; be available to play the supportive role if needed, yes; share with you the right feedback, yes; but never ever must they make you feel relaxed all the time and not challenged enough to strike a higher target while stretching in your comfort zone.”
And in case you’ve spent months and years with a nice boss who has made you too comfortable with how you’ve been doing things, then pardon me for the candidness; please pack your bags and run! Just joking. You may, if you like of course, have a chat with them and review your growth pattern.
Additionally, if you’re feeling that lately your boss has pushed you to go and find the answers to a challenge then thank the heavens for this difficult boss. Because, overcoming difficulties gives us the nerves of steel.
Now you might say that this article is all nonsense; and I would thank you to keep reading it till here. Really thank you! Also you must be correct because some bosses become so tough that it get’s suffocating and toxic existing in the same environment as them.
And yes if your tough boss is not explaining you the challenge, conveying to you what they literally want you to achieve or is limiting their communication with you then really, those are the kind of bosses people legit tend to leave. And the world says that so and so organization’s culture is not an empowering one.
Solution? Well… If only we people could talk to us people; clearly and ever so gracefully. Anyway that is a topic for another day 🙂
Wishing you power and positivity!
Stay blessed.
Author: Naureen Ansari – a certified soft-skills facilitator, consultant and entrepreneur.